Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Growing Up

Looking through pictures on my phone makes me realize how much my little guy has grown. It's so amazing that only 12 (almost) short weeks ago, we were bringing him home from the hospital in his tiny little newborn sized pajamas with little motorcycles all over them. And now, he's holding his head up, "talking", wearing 6 month size clothes, and moving up to size 2 diapers. I know it sounds incredibly cliche, but where the heck did the time go??? Weren't you only this big like... yesterday?

And now you're being a cute little MAN like this...

And yeah, motherhood has it's challenges, but I seriously wouldn't change anything for the world. My son is the center of my universe and every time I see his sleeping face, I feel my heart grow.

Here's lookin' at you, kid.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

2 Month Appointment

Last week was Gunner's 2 month doctor's appointment, and I can't believe how fast time has flown by! Cliche to say, I know, but it is the truth. I was really excited to see how much he had grown since his 2 week appointment. He officially weighed 11 pounds, 14 oz! HOLY BIG CHILD.

The part I was dreading the most, was his vaccinations. He was due for 3 shots and an oral vaccine, and I wanted nothing to do with it. Of course, Bobby was working, so I had to brave the 8:15 AM appointment alone, and see him in pain alone. Sad day indeed.

This is Gunner at around 7:30 AM that morning, feeling great, not knowing what was in store for him.

To this sad little face after he got stuck. WAH.

My poor little buddy slept for 6 straight hours after the appointment which he never does, and I felt so bad for him.

On the bright side, after he woke up, he felt completely fine, because he gave me the BIGGEST smile he has ever given me!

The doctors must be doin' something right :]

Back to Work/ Alone

Now that Bobby is back to work, I am having a hard time adjusting to being alone all night, and most of the day. I forgot how brutal his schedule is, and how much work it is for me, when he goes to work. Extra laundry, packing lunches, extra groceries, extra gas money, the list goes on and on.

I appreciate that he made the smart decision for our family to go back early, but it really shook me up to have to deal with Gunner by myself so suddenly. In my mind, I still had a good 4 weeks left to prepare for life alone with a newborn. It was a shock to say the least.

Luckily my mom was able to come over almost every night that first week and help me adjust to being alone again. After an entire month of sleeping next to my husband every night, having breakfast together every morning, and having conversations that didn't include "I'm so tired" or "I don't want to go back to work", I got a taste of what life must be like for people with normal 9-5 jobs.

I know it must sound a little bit conceited, but the fact that I can run a household, take care of my kid, take care of myself and manage to keep my sanity is kind of amazing to me. When Bobby works the night shift, I see him for a total of about 3 hours per day, and it is usually spent cooking for him, and trying to get him to wake up enough to have a conversation. Then it's off to work again, and I'm alone for the night. He's gone from 4 PM - 6 AM the following day, and that will never get easier. I just miss him so much.

On the flipside, Goonie Butt and I get tons of quality time together. We get to snuggle all day, and that's just fine with me!

2 month birthday/ No Coachella

Before I got pregnant, I bought tickets for the Coachella music festival, and had been planning on going even after I had Gunner. My one condition was that Bobby still had to be off of work, otherwise I wouldn't feel comfortable leaving him. Thanks to the extreme intelligence (sarcasm, can you tell?) of the state disability office, Bobby had to go back to work early, and I sold my ticket, which made me so sad. I had been looking forward to doing this one nice thing for myself for a long time. Anyone who knows me, knows that I NEVER do anything nice for myself. I'm extremely frugal, and a little bit overly responsible sometimes, so this was a huge deal for me.

On the other hand, I was dreading having to leave my little man, and was secretly hoping that Bobby would decide to come with me, or that something would happen that would force me to stay home. Low and behold, the universe decided I should be home with my baby instead, which was probably the smart thing to do anyway.

So, I settled for watching the live stream on youtube of a few of my favorite bands and drinking a few beers to make up for it. A few days later, Gunner turned 2 months old, and I can honestly say that being around him and seeing his handsome little face, even for 5 minutes, is so much more satisfying than any damn festival in the desert could ever be. I love my son, and I think this decision/ experience is teaching me the most important lesson of parenthood: you can't always get what you want. 


On March 17th, Bobby and I celebrated our 5 year dating anniversary, and 2 days later on the 19th, we celebrated our 1 year wedding anniversary. In the past, we've always made a huge deal of our anniversaries, but this year, it was a little tough to get out of the house for even a few hours, and since the state disability office was being ridiculous, money was kind of strange too. Mostly, I think we both felt... complete. We didn't need to buy each other extravagant gifts or go on an expensive vacation to show how much we love one another. Our wonderful son, and all of the challenges, adventures, and memories we've shared over the past month was more than enough.

Now that we are parents together, I definitely see Bobby in a new amazing way. He's not only the love of my life, but the father of my child, which is such a beautiful thing. It has been so special seeing him become a father, and I definitely feel incredibly lucky to have such a kind, loving, and patient husband. I couldn't handle this rollercoaster without him, that's for sure.


Now, this might not be a topic for all of you, but it is a huge part of my life right now, and I find that the more I talk about it, the more motivated I am to keep going.

First off, no one ever told me how much of a lifestyle and commitment breastfeeding would be. I'm not going to lie, there have been a few moments where I really considered giving up all together, but true to form, I am WAY too stubborn to do anything I don't want to do.

After Gunner was born, I discovered he wasn't very coordinated, and had such a hard time latching on, and when he did latch on, it wasn't right, and I was in a lot of pain. He was SO bad at the whole latching on thing, that I literally had scabs on my nipples and would silently cry every time I fed him, so I wouldn't scare him and discourage him from eating. He took a really long time to open his mouth the right way, and I think he sensed my frustration, because it got to a point where every time I pulled out the boppy pillow, he would start screaming.

So, after about a week of pure agony for both of us, I made the call to just pump and bottle feed. I originally had planned to hold off on pumping or bottles until he was a few weeks old, because of various literature I read that said it can affect your supply, and cause nipple confusion, so I was completely relieved when he took to it so well.

Poor little guy was probably hungry the entire time. He just wasn't coordinated or calm enough to get the hang of it. It really bummed me out that I couldn't bond with him through nursing, but it was a relief that I wasn't the only one who had to get up at night to feed him. On the other hand, having to pump every few hours was really limiting. I couldn't go anywhere for more than a few hours, and it seemed like every time I needed to go somewhere, my boobs had different plans. Plus, I think people found pumping way more awkward than just feeding my baby under a blanket.

After venting to one of the gals in my Baby & Me class about how I had offered my boob to Gunner a few times, and he had no idea what to do with it, the lactation consultant that teaches the class told me to try and take a bath with him, and for some reason, the water will create a re-birthing experience and he will know what to do. I sort of brushed the idea off, because I figured I'M SMART AND HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. Wrong. The very next day, I was giving him a bath like I always do, with him in the tub with me after I take my shower, and he looked at me, I looked at him, and we had this... moment. I knew it was the right time to try again, and it worked! I was so happy, that I almost cried. I called Bobby in to show him, and we were both really excited that our little guy had finally gotten the hint.

So the past few weeks, I've been nursing him most of the time, and pumping at night when he goes down for his 5 hour stretch. Things couldn't be going better, and I'm so happy that I have the resources to help me through tough times!

All I have to say, is that mothers who breastfeed for any length of time deserve a major high five. This crap isn't easy!

Baby Weight

I'll be the first person to admit that I'm not very proud of how much weight I gained during this pregnancy. I started at.... bigger than I would have liked to be, and ended up... MUCH bigger than I would have liked to be. 42 pounds all together. BLAH.

The first night after I had Gunner, I was really nervous that the weight was going to stick around forever, because after the chaos wore down, and I was finally able to take a shower, I weighed myself in the bathroom, and I had only lost 7 pounds. But... Gunner weighed 8.4. I blame it on all of the fluids they pumped me full of.

Luckily, I weighed myself 2 weeks later and I had lost 25 pounds. Sweet! Only 17 more to go. BLAH.

Even though 25 pounds seems like a huge number, I was still bigger than I have ever been in my life, and my body was not in very good condition. It literally felt like my muscles had separated and were lazy/dead/disintegrated. I tried doing a few sit ups, and although my brain knew what to do, my body just wasn't responding.

That was a few weeks ago, and in the mean time I've lost another 6 pounds, and joined a gym, which is great, but I'm still not where I would like to be. Eating healthy is really difficult with a newborn. I used to really enjoy making homecooked meals every night of the week, but most of the time I can barely get more than a half hour to myself, and usually I try to sit down and rest, rather than cook. Needless to say, our freezer if full of Trader Joe's easy meals, and our cupboards are full of snacks that probably aren't doing my waistline any justice.

I am trying to workout about 2-3 times per week, and just trying to do as much cardio as I can, in the hopes that the surrounding muscles will help my core get back into a place where I can start targeting them again. I know it is probably going to take me as long, if not longer, than 9 months to get back to where I was. It's going to be a long road, but I'm willing to do the work. I really missed the ritual of going to the gym while I was pregnant, and I am determined to not let life get the best of me!

Until I reach my goal, nothing but dresses to hide these baby rolls!

Baby & Me Classes

Since Gunner was 2 weeks old, I've been attending Baby & Me Classes at the New Parent Resource Center, and I have to say, it was the best money and time I ever spent. Not only do I get the chance to meet other moms that have babies within a few weeks of Gunner, I get educated on a ton of important subjects. It also gives me an excuse to get out of the house once a week, which has been somewhat of a challenge.

The topics they cover in the class are things like sleep training, adjusting to parenthood, infant massage, crying, brain development, and newborn care. Most of the things I'm learning, I'm already halfway doing, or already halfway noticing, but it really gives me great perspective, and puts the pieces of the baby-puzzle together. At least 3 times per class, I have a "doh" moment, and ideas just sort of click. I feel like I can handle the challenges of motherhood a little bit better with a bit of knowledge.

In class a few weeks ago, they covered brain development, and apparently, crying between the hours of 6 and 8 PM is not only normal, but completely necessary. It has something to do with their nervous systems being wound up, and needing to get all of that energy out, to prepare for the next day of development. So, now, when Gunner is being fussy at this time of night, somehow knowing that it is normal, and knowing that the end is in sight, it makes it a little more tolerable.

On another note, it has been really neat to see other babies in the same age range grow and develop at different rates over the weeks. It is so interesting to see how every baby is different and how early their personalities come out. Even hearing the different pitches of their cries just blows my mind. Everyone in my class has commented on how big Gunner is for his age, and how well behaved he is. Usually, he sleeps during the class, and when we get home i feed him and we play on a blanket on the floor, which is really nice. These classes are a great way to break up the day, and I'm really sad there are only 6 weeks worth of topics.

I think Gunner might really like these classes too!

Sunday, April 1, 2012

2nd week home

Our second week home was filled with doctor's appointments. First, he had his 2 week checkup, which we found out he had gained back all of his birth weight, and then some! He was already up to 8 pounds, 13 ounces. Way to go little man!

Also, we had to take him back to the hospital for his hearing screening. The silly hospital staff decided to do the test right after he was circumcised, so of course he was wiggling around and fussing, and they couldn't get a reading. Thanks a lot...

Even though it was a pain in the butt to pack him up and go to the appointment, I was so relieved when he passed. I can't even imagine how sad I would be to find out he was deaf or had a hearing issue. Never being able to listen to music, hear the sound of our voices or anything. I know there are a ton of programs out there these days to help the disabled, but I was so happy to find out that he is healthy and happy.

As for the rest of the week, we just spent our time trying to convince him that bath time isn't so bad (I think he likes it now!), and trying to remember to not put him to bed with a pacifier. He tends to spit it out when he falls asleep and then realizes its gone and starts crying. About every 30 seconds. That was a fun night!

On another note, Bobby's aunt threw a "Welcome to the World Gunner" BBQ for us, which was really fun. Here's a picture of Bobby and his bestie and his son :]

First week home

After we were released from the hospital, our first week home had so many special moments. We were so excited to finally have some alone time- silly hospital staff just doesn't know when to quit! We were also really nervous because despite reading a ton of books, articles, and watching videos on how to care for a newborn, it was still a really new experience. I mean, it has been more than 10 years since my nephews were infants, so I was feeling really rusty.

The first milestone (that was really special for Bobby) was our first family trip to Lowe's hahaha. MEN...

Of course, Gunner's first bath... Which he hated.

Then his first walk, which he slept through, but hey, it's a start.

And of course, he peed on himself in the middle of a diaper change at least 3 times, which was lovely. Oh the joys of parenthood!

Gunner Lee Stovall

The last few weeks of pregnancy were especially grueling, and I can really remember how frustrated and anxious I was, by reading the last few posts on here. Let's start from the beginning... My "new" due date came and went, without any real signs of progress. My cervix hadn't made any changes since the week before, and I was feeling so scared and angry about the possibility of an induction. After my last appointment, my doctor let me choose whether to be induced on the 20th or the 25th. Of course, I chose sooner, rather than later, out of pure excitement. After I got home and realized how soon that actually was, and how my body wasn't doing ANYTHING, I started to second guess my decision, and wondered if Gunner wasn't ready yet. I started to feel really guilty and selfish about wanting to force him to come out. I mean, the longer he stayed in there, the healthier he would be, right? It was a really confusing few days to say the least.

So, naturally, since my induction was already scheduled and there was nothing I could do but wait, I decided to do everything I could to induce myself naturally. I bounced on an exercise ball for HOURS. I took black cohosh. I went power walking. I did nipple stimulation (sorry, TMI). I ate pineapple. I ate spicy food. I went walking again. AND AGAIN. After 3 days of trying to make my body a really uncomfortable place to be, I gave up hope. Gunner was going to come in his own sweet time. I realized this sad fact while I was in the shower, and I started crying, and decided to level with my little man. I let him know how afraid I was of unnatural drugs, and the possibility of a c-section. I stood there in the shower for a good 20 minutes letting him know that it was OK to come out and meet everyone. That we loved him, and he needed to listen to his mommy. I went on another walk that afternoon and Gunner finally decided to cooperate. While Bobby and I were on our long walk, I felt something weird in my underpants (TMI again haha), and when I went to the restroom, I realized I had lost my plug! I have never been so happy to see blood in my life. I knew labor would be right around the corner, and I started to get really excited, and really nervous all at the same time.

The next night, after an entire day of simultaneously jumping for joy, and crapping my pants out of fear, I decided to go to sleep at around 11 PM.

Then, at 2 AM, I woke up with FULL. ON. CONTRACTIONS. 3 minutes apart, 90 seconds long. According to my doctor, you're supposed to head to the hospital when they are 5 minutes apart and 1 minute long, so I was already ahead of the game.

I hopped in the shower, and realized that I need to get the show on the road when my contractions started to blur together. I rinsed my hair as fast as I could, and yelled for Bobby to put the hospital bag in the car. Poor guy had only gotten 1 hour of sleep, but amazingly didn't forget a single thing on the list. He was great. But I know he was just as nervous as I was.

When we got to the hospital, they checked me in, and I was only 3 cm. They usually aren't supposed to admit you until you are 4 cm, but since I had a really nice nurse, she decided to keep me. They put me into a room, and it was basically just hurry up and wait from that point. 4 hours go by, and they check me again. Still 3 cm. They break my water & leave. 2 more hours go by. They check me again, still no progress. I ask for the epidural because at this point, I am laboring so hard, that I fall asleep between contractions and I can't even talk straight.

The anesthesiologist comes in, preps me, sticks me and keeps pumping up the dosage because I can still feel everything. He leaves, and about 10 minutes later I become completely numb from the chest down. One of my legs is dead, and I can't move it at all. 6 more hours goes by, and because of the pitocin they give me, I am actually dilating now. I'm at 8 cm. It won't be long.

I start feeling a lot of pressure, and somehow know that I shouldn't push the epidural button anymore. My mommy instinct kicks in, and I ask the nurse to check me again. I'm at 10 cm. Bobby is out getting coffee in the lobby, and he makes it back to the room in 1 minute flat. They chase everyone out of the room, hand Bobby a leg and tell us its time. I don't even know how I was able to lift my leg, but I got a second wave of energy and motivation. Maybe that's because they turned off the epidural...

Then, all of a sudden, I see a tiny, red, fist go into the air, and a triumphant little wail along with it. My son. My strong, wonderful, baby boy is finally here. That first moment, seeing his hand in the air, and hearing his voice for the first time was the best feeling in the world. All the months of waiting, hurting and stressing were suddenly worth it. They pick him up and put him on my chest and I can barely see his face because I'm crying so hard. I can't even believe he is in my arms. Bobby and I are hugging and bawling and shaking and hugging some more. I can't say anything except OH MY GOD I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. Both of them. They are my family.

Gunner Lee Stovall was born at 5:37 PM and he weighed 8 pounds, 4.2 ounces and was 21 and 3/4 inches long. I feel like I've just won a race. It is the best feeling in the world to go through hell and meet the person you've been waiting for at the end. I feel like I have known him my whole life. I recognize him. He is me, he is my husband, he is mine, he is ours. I can't even believe it. I'm seeing stars.


I want to apologize to you all for not updating you on all of the wonderful (and not so wonderful) things that have happened in the past 6+ weeks. I always knew taking care of a newborn would be a full time job, but I really wasn't prepared for how in love with this little man I would fall. I couldn't justify spending more than a few minutes away from him, especially not to blab on a blog I'm not sure anyone even reads. as the weeks went on, there seemed to be a mountain of milestones, and I wasn't sure how I was going to organize all my millions of thoughts. I sat down and wrote a list, so please bear with me! At least 10 posts are in the works. Coming soon, I promise!

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Lady of Leisure...Kinda

So last Wednesday was my official last day of work, and as you can see by my lack of blog posts, I've been enjoying myself. Sleeping in, making big breakfasts, taking naps, gardening, cleaning and just enjoying life has been the best experience. It also allows me to spend more time with Bobby in between his shifts at work, and that alone is amazing. I think we are both starting to realize that we aren't ever going to be alone again. That is both a comforting/sweet and scary thought.

Other than being a complete lady of leisure for the past 7 days, I've actually started to get regular contractions. They come about every 45 minutes, and aren't painful at all. It's great to know that my body knows what it is supposed to do, and that it is progressing naturally, but it is still pretty terrifying to think that in a few short days, I actually have to go through with this. I don't even want to talk about it. Lets just ignore that subject for now.

At my last appointment, I found out that I was 2 cm dilated, and 80% effaced. So, a little bit of progress from the week before, but not as much as I'd hoped. I'm just an impatient person though, so its no surprise that I am getting anxious. I think that after all the contractions I've been having, my appointment on Wednesday (which is also my new due date) will show even more progress. Lets keep our fingers crossed that baby Gunner is finally ready to meet everyone!

2 days until my new due date! HOLY SHIT!

Monday, February 6, 2012

38 weeks!

It is SO BIZARRE that my new due date is NEXT WEEK! I can't even believe that I am almost done being pregnant, and so close to finally meeting my little man! I feel ready. I think... Our house is totally ready for him: the nursery is done, the freezer is packed with food, the bathroom and kitchen cabinets are stuffed with essentials, the bills are paid, my disability foms are filled out, everything is pretty clean, and our hospital bag is packed. Now all I have to do is wrap my head around the idea that I'm going to be someone's mom. That notion is the hardest one I think. The fact that I am an offical, real, functioning adult. With a kid. I know I can do it, but it is really weird. I mean, all of these responsibilities really snuck up on me. I catch myself doing something really adult-like and it makes me do a double take. As I'm washing my DISHES after dinner, after a full day at WORK, and my HUSBAND asks me if I paid the ELECTRICITY, and I say yes, and I also paid the CAR REGISTRATION and ordered new CHECKS, I feel like I'm living someone else's life. I mean, when the heck did I become an adult? Now, with a baby in the mix, I think its really going to seal the whole "I'm old" deal hahaha.

But seriously, I am SO looking forward to hugging and kissing my little bubbies! I've been dreaming about him almost every night. I am just so excited to count his little toes, see his little face, and hear his little voice. I can imagine how much I love him in my head, but I don't think I am really prepared for how much my heart is going to grow the minute they place him on my chest. Its an overwhelming idea that he will be 50% mine, 50% Bobbys and 100% ours. I can't wait to meet him and tell him how much I love him and how long I've been waiting to have him here. He will be my greatest accomplishment, my most prized possession and my greatest joy. This is going to be wild guys, freaking wild.

10 days left until my due date, 3 days left of work, and I'm guessing he is about 19.75 inches and about 7 pounds. Supposedly the size of a leek! 

Friday, February 3, 2012

Its all happening!

I went to my weekly doctor appointment this afternoon, and found out that I am officially 1.5 cm dilated, 60% effaced, and they even moved my due date up by 5 whole days! My doctor is convinced I'm going to deliver early, and said he is putting his money on February 16th! He said my body is already getting ready for labor, and that I most likely won't need to be induced! I am beyond excited, and hope that when I go back next week, I will have made some progress.

As of today, I have 13 days left! HOLY COW!!! Its really happening!!!

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

37 weeks

Another week has passed, and I am becoming more and more impatient! I am over being pregnant! I want to finally meet my son, claim my body back, not be in pain anymore, and finally feel like myself again.

I'm also really excited to start my maternity leave. If Gunner decides to come on time, I'll have 2 amazing weeks to myself to relax, finish any projects that have been left hanging, and to clean the crap out of my house. Only 5 more working days, and I'm FREE!!!

On another note, this little man must be healthy and growing, because his kicks, punches, stretches and rolls are getting downright painful. Sometimes, he gets so rough in there, that I'm scared he is going to break my water. I'm so glad I only have 3 weeks (or less) of this torture. I think because I had an easy pregnancy tis whole time, all of the symptoms and discomfort are being packed into these last 3 weeks. I woke up last night with such bad heartburn, I really thought I was going to throw up. Plus, he was being a little acrobat, so naturally, I was whining, and being a diva. Lets hope he takes it easy on me these next 3 weeks, I don't know how much more I can handle.

This week, my little bubbas is 19.25 inches long, 6.75 pounds and the size of a swiss chard. 19 more days! AHHH!

Thursday, January 26, 2012

36 weeks!

Monday was my 36 week mark, and a few days earlier, was the offical start of the 1 month countdown! Holy cow. I am going to be a mom in less than a month. I am really starting to get nervous about labor and delivery. I'm terrifed of needing to have a c-section. For some reason, the entire time I've been pregnant, I've had this irrational fear of sharp objects. I don't even like to walk around the house with scissors. I just have these really vivid images of me falling and stabbing myself. I mean, I'm so clumsy lately, that wouldn't be that big of a surprise. So, I make sure everything is pointed away from me, and I am really careful. With that said, you can only imagine how scared and disappointed I would be to need to deliver surgically. It is probably a silly fear to have, but surgery just freaks me out. But, I know that doctors really only give c-sections when the safety of the baby is in jeaporady, so I guess I will just have to suck it up and roll with the punches.

On the other hand, thinking about my lady bits exploding during a regular delivery is equally scary. I'm planning on getting an epidural, but it is mostly the recovery I'm nervous about. All the bleeding, pain, swelling, tearing, discomfort and general gross-ness of the entire process makes me cringe. I'm pretty positive that I won't even look down there for a few weeks. I don't want to scar myself for life. I mean, there are some things you can't un-see. Bobby has also made a stern promise that he won't actually look at what is going on with my nether-regions during birth. He is going to hold my hand, and not my leg. If I can't even stomach the idea of turning inside out, I can only imagine how he feels about seeing that gruesome sight. No one needs to see that.

Other than that, time is SLOWLY chugging by. Only 9 days of work left, and  25 days until my due date. I'm becoming really impatient and anxious, but I think that is mostly my hormones. I'm trying really hard to not be a complete basket case, but as Bobby can testify to, not sure my efforts are going so well. :[

This week, baby Gunner is 18.75 inches long, 5.75 pounds and the size of a crenshaw melon (whatever the heck that is!)

Actually, I asked my doctor how big he thought the baby would be if I delivered at full term, and he said 8 - 81/2 pounds. On average at this point in a pregnancy, babies gain about a 1/2 pound a week, so it looks like my son is about 6 - 6 1/2 pounds. Little chunkers!

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

35 Weeks!

Yesterday I hit my 35 week mark. I can't believe how incredibly fast this pregnancy has flown by! On one hand, I am completely ready to be back to my normal self again, and on the other hand, I know I'm going to miss having my little bubbas so close to me 24/7. Its going to be a huge change to not be able to protect him, hold him, and know exactly what he's up to every second of the day. I can't even remember what my body looked like before I got pregnant. Seeing pictures of my (kinda) flat stomach makes me a little sad. I love the way I look, but I don't really like the way I feel. Things have progressively become more and more uncomfortable as time goes by, and I am genuinely curious how I am ever going to make it past the next 5 weeks. Back pain is a daily visitor, heartburn seems to never go away, stretch marks seem to multiply overnight and any remnant of feeling pretty or sexy in any way are long-gone.

But... To say that I'm so excited to finally meet this little person who has been taking over my mind, thoughts, life and house for the past 8 months, is a total understatement. I want him here in my arms already. I can hardly wait. I think because the nursery is completely done and we don't have many lingering projects or items to buy, I am starting to nest in a different way. Last weekend, especially because of the start of the New Year, I got it into my head that the backyard needed to be re-done and beautified. So I waddled my way over to Green Thumb, and with the help of my genius husband, got our drip irrigation system hooked up correctly, and planted some rosemary, lavendar, thyme and peppermint in a once-lonely and empty spot in the backyard. I also started clearing out some of the dead leaves and rocks and spiderwebs leftover from fall and winter from the corners of the yard, and began prepping those areas to plant bulbs and morning glories that I've started in peat pots. Our backyard also had a large patch of dirt ready for a vegetable garden, so I figure once I've done everything else, I can start on that too.

I don't know how much time or energy I'll have for gardening once our little guy is here, but I figure I will be more likely to take him out into the yard and give him a healthy dose of sunshine, if my backyard is pretty. And basically, since we have a drip irrigation system that just needed to be connected in a few spots and needed a few more misters/sprinklers, I don't have to worry about daily care. My plants wont die if I forget to water for a few days. Everything is on a timer, which is really nice. And it has been really nice to work on a project that isn't baby related for once. I think Bobby has enjoyed figuring everything out and helping me along the way. Its really soothing to just be outside in the sunshine, not thinking, talking, or really doing anything except enjoying nature. I want to try and garden more often, it feels so great.

Other than that, we have just been enjoying the nice weather, and counting down the days until our little guy is here, and until we are both off of work! I only have 16 working days left, and if Gunner decides to come on time, Bobby only has 18 days left. Its going to be such a relief to not have to worry about being anywhere else but home, with each other!

This week, our little chunky is 18.25 inches long, 5.25 lbs and the size of a honeydew!

34 days to go!

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

34 Weeks & Big Bear!

This past weekend was our annual trip up to Big Bear for our birthdays (ours are 5 days apart), and it was SO NICE to get away from everything.

Our besties came with us, and it was just 2 days of eating, relaxing, exploring and building fires. We really needed it. After the craziness of the holidays, and all the hustle and bustle trying to get things ready for the baby, it is an understatement to say that we have been overwhelmed lately. Eventhough it wasn't snowing, it was still cold enough to have a few bits of snow on the ground, and to really feel like winter.

I was really excited to wear my new maternity pea coat that bobby bought me for my birthday, and I was so glad I had it because it was freezing, especially down by the lake.

And pretty much the entire lake was frozen, so it was really cool to walk out on the little piers and throw rocks to try and break it, which wasn't going to happen since it was about 4 inches thick.

Bobby also found some offroading trails that we explored, which was really nice, because thats where all the snow was hidden. He drove super slow, and avoided all the bumps for me, which was sweet.

Overall, it was a great last vacation before the baby comes. 34 weeks down, 6 more to go!

This week, baby Gunner is 18 inches long, 4.75 pounds and the size of a large cantaloupe!

41 days to go!

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

33 weeks

I've been awful about blogging regularly lately. The holidays were completely distracting and wonderful, and I just couldn't pull myself away from the cookies and tamales long enough to fit a few short words in :[

Anyway, on Monday, I hit 33 weeks! Its so insane how fast the time is flying by. I officially only have 5 weeks left of work (WOOOHOOOO!!!) and 7 weeks left until my little bubbas is here! Eventhough we are pretty much completely done with the nursery, and have everything he needs, I am still really nervous. On one hand, I wish he was here already. I want to see his face, hold him, tell him how much I've been draming about him, and kiss him. I'm so anxious to just MEET this little person who has been taking over my entire life more the majority of this year! But on the other hand, thinking about all of the new resonsibilities that come with a baby is kind of overwhelming. Bottles, naps, pumping, baths, diapers, laundry, no sleep, diaper bags, etc etc etccccccc.... It's going to be tough, but I know it is going to be one of the most rewarding jobs I've ever had. I know my house and life is going to be upside down for the first few weeks until I get the hang of it, but I just can't freaking wait. It is so bizarre to think that in a few short weeks, I'm going to be someone's mom. And it's not just "a baby", it's "my baby". WHOA.

This week, Gunner is 17 inches long, 4.25 lbs. and the size of a pineapple!

From now on, I'm going to include a countdown in days... 47 days to go! AH!